Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
