The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
