Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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