I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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