But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
