My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
there was a trapeze. enough said
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
