Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
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