did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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