You can't motorboat a personality
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize