There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
