loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Sorry about my life...
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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