While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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