are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You're so nebulous sometimes
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
