i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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