I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
