wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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