Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
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I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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