yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Mom said you looked used
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
