I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
