Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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