why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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