Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Even my vagina gasped.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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