I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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