he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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