I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize