69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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