Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
