well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
