there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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