Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize