I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
