Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
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