The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
