y did u give ur computer a hand job?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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