So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
