I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I party with great urgency now.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
