he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
i think i just lost a toe
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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