You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
