when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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