Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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