Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?

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(416): View more from Ontario

I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.

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(972): View more from Texas

I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(405): View more from Oklahoma

his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy

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(703): View more from Virginia

rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.

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(925): View more from California

I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.

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