But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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