Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
