sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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