I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
