4 words: hood of his car
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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