No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm both gender and math confused
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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