Whats the glycemic index on semen?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
