what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
