i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
