How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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