my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she peed on how many people?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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